Helping Parents Include Kids in a Second Marriage
Planning a wedding can be stressful but particularly for a second marriage. We are helping parents find unique and special ways to include their kids in planning and then on the special day.
When you are marrying for the second time, you tend to focus on cutting out the excess to enjoy the whole day. Often you have already had a big wedding the first time and a second marriage is all about the family you are creating.
If you are becoming a blended family with children from one or both sides, you will face challenges. The way you include the children in the marriage ceremony will set the tone for your relationship moving forward.
There is a fine line between including the children and giving the day to the children. Like everything else in life, balance is the key.
Below you will find some favored ways for helping parents to include children in the wedding without having them take over.
Parenting Advice For a Second Marriage
Busy hands are happy hands but you must pay attention to ensure your little one isn’t becoming overwhelmed. They need to understand that this is your special day whilst still feeling that they are an important part of the process.
Our parenting advice for younger childrens role in a second marriage is to keep their contributions to a small area. This includes both in the planning of the wedding and on the day.
If you see they are getting tired, let them nap or play while your bridal party works on.
Get Online For Second Marriage Outfits
When you are trying to find a wedding dress for your second marriage it is much easier to begin your research online. This gives you a huge selection and you are under no pressure to make a choice.
Chances are your child will quite enjoy looking at the different sites with you and depending on their age may have valid input. It is also a great in helping parents involve their kids to pick their own outfit for the day.
Once you have selected a few outfits it is time to get busy for the day and visit stores to try them on. You could always send an email before the day letting the store know that you will be coming.
That way the assistant can have the outfits ready and waiting for you and may even be able to offer advice on others based on your selection. This means a much less stressful and stream-lined outing especially with young children involved in a second marriage.
Make the day a family shopping event that you can all enjoy. This is a great way in helping parents keep everybody involoved in the lead up to the big day.
Try on the gowns and let the family have a voice in the which ones they like. Get each member to do the same process so that each family member has their own time in the spotlight.
Our best parenting advice is to get the littlies to go first as they will most likely get tired and bored later. If needed they can find a quiet spot to play or draw or even have a quick nap.
Create a Poster Board
Let your child create a poster for their ideas of the big day in your second marriage. If you can put it on the refrigerator, that would work well.
Let them go through some old wedding magazines (we know you have some) and cut out pictures they like with safety scissors. These could be of dresses for you and them, outfits for older siblings or even other family members.
Tape the selections to the poster so they can remove pictures and add new ones they find. As you can see this is helping parents by keeping them busy for quite some time. Kids love to be involved, both in the lead up and on the day of the second marriage.
Keep the game going. They can select outfits for themselves or find suggestions for what they think their Grandmother should wear.
You can let them find examples of wedding flowers, venues and even the cake. Be sure you take them to the cake tasting.
Helping Parents Choose Accessories
Children can often have a great eye – and we all know how honest they are! In a second marriage, accessories are just as important as your first.
You will want to look at the obvious flowers and a hairpiece, but don’t forget shoes and jewelry.
When looking at accessories we suggest using the same method as when selecting outfits. Get your children involved by looking online or in magazines for the whole outfit or they could select individual pieces.
Remember when choosing shoes for you and the children that wedding days are usually long affairs. Try to find footwear that is stylish and comfortable.
We have found great parenting advice for helping parents with footwear for a second marriage is to buy them early in the process. That way you can “wear them in” during the lead up to the day so that you will be comfortable and ready to go for the whole day.
With jewellery for you all it is best to select a few pieces and let the kids help choose what you will wear.
Reward Their Efforts
Small children love being involved in the planning of a second marriage. It is a big day and very busy time in the lead up for everybody involved.
By the time you have completed the bridal gown selection, your little one may be tired and cranky. Go out for a kid-friendly dinner where there is a playground to burn off some of the nervous energy.
Praise them for a job well done and let the whole family know how well they did.
Make sure to include them in the fun stuff. Let them go with you and the others to get your hair done. Take them when you get your manicure or a pedicure.
Helping parents to select the bridesmaids gifts and all kinds of little things will make them feel special and part of the process.
By helping parents in the planning of a second marriage you are laying a firm foundation for your children.
You are not just saying they are important you have showed them by having them be a part of the whole process.
Change can be difficult for children but with patience, love and good communication you can accomplish anything.